Chapter 11

 

Troubleshooting

Problems that arise are not necessarily bad things. They are opportunities for growth. If you don’t have any opportunities for growth, you’re not evolving, so think of problems that come up as good things. The only way they are bad is if you do not take care of them.

Jealousy

Whenever there are human dynamics involved, there is the potential for power struggles, and insecurity is the catalyst for power struggles. A new mother with a new baby and a new nanny are a breeding ground for insecurity, so it is very probable that jealousies may arise.

Types of jealousies you may encounter:

1.      The nanny may be jealous of your relationship with your child.

2.      The nanny may be jealous of your relationship with your husband.

3.      The nanny may be jealous of you and your looks, your job, your home, clothes, your car, your life.

4.      Your child may be jealous of anyone you spend time with when you are not with him or her.

5.      You may be jealous that your nanny is young and thin – especially if you are still trying to lose pregnancy weight.

6.      You may be jealous that your nanny has a carefree life and gets sleep at night.

7.      You may be jealous that your nanny has a boyfriend and what you imagine is a great sex life. Many times sex lives dwindle after a new baby is born. This is a natural state due to hormone crashes – especially if you are nursing your child – and lack of sleep.

8.      You may be jealous of the way your husband acts around your nanny.

9.      You may feel displaced as the primary caregiver in your home.

10.  You may feel jealous that your nanny is doing a good job, and you’re struggling at yours.

The best way to start to deal with jealousies is to be honest with yourself about your feelings. Don’t run to the person you’re jealous of right away to confess and lay it all out on the table.