The principle behind this method is to leave your child alone,
starting with a small increment of time, and graduating the time he or she is
left alone to longer periods of time, over time.
For instance, you may greet
the nanny and leave the child for a few minutes to go to the bathroom. The next
day you may greet the nanny and leave the child to run an errand next door. The
following day you may greet the nanny and leave the child in her care while you
go to the market. Each day, you increase the amount of time you are away. If
and when the child cries, you firmly remind the child that you will be back in
“X” number of minutes (depending on where in the modification process you are),
and that it is his or her job to be “okay” with the nanny while you are gone.
Then, you firmly leave, whether your child is crying or not.
For parents who are running a nanny trial employment week before hiring
a nanny:
If you are running a nanny
trial employment week, look for the following things in your nanny candidate
during this week:
1.
Is
she prompt and timely?
2.
Is
she clean and appropriately groomed for the job?
3.
Is
your nanny showing up for work exhausted?
4.
Is
she happy to be at work?
5.
How
flexible is she with your child?
6.
Does
your child like the nanny?
7.
Are
her activities things that your child is interested in?
8.
Is
she overly-anxious to get the child out of your eyesight?
9.
Is
she comfortable with your child’s moods?
10. Is
she attentive to your child’s food needs?
What you should consider:
Your child may be anxious, and would give any nanny
a hard time this particular week. If your child is extra clingy to you, or has
separation anxiety, this does not necessarily mean that he or she hates the
nanny. The child may hate losing you. The nanny is just the object of that
feeling. On the other hand, your child
may just not like the nanny at all. A nanny who is right for your child is not
upset by a child’s moods, and is understanding and patient.
Just because the nanny shows up for work, doesn’t
mean you get to go to work the first day. Be prepared to make a possible
gradual exit or be around the house for a while, if in another room. Do leave
the house, if but for a short while, while the nanny is there. You need to see
how the nanny and your child handle this transition.
