nanny
and get her opinion on how much time she is spending on the phone while she is
working. If she thinks that she is on the phone a “normal” amount of time, the
two of you may just have different ideas of what “normal” is. You can try to
laugh off your differences, but firmly tell her what your house rules are
regarding the telephone.
Ideally, she will self regulate her phone time, once
she learns of your needs. However, you may want to “check in” by calling her
and seeing if she’s on the other line, when you call. If you have asked her to
limit her time, and she is now lying to you about the amount of time she’s on
the phone, decide if this is something you want to fire her over.
Find out if she is having a personal crisis at home,
and if so, what it is. If she is prone to drama, you will see many more
episodes of this behavior. If she is having a true once in a lifetime family
crisis, you should wait it out.
If you do set up rules, like phone time while on the
job and your nanny refuses to follow them, you will find yourself poised for a
power struggle. If this is the only area that you will find yourself in this
dynamic then you’re okay to let it go.
But the chances are if a nanny is not
honest with you once, she will not be honest with you again.
Sadly, this is one
of those non-emergent firings that should happen. Keep your eyes open for a new
nanny, and look for someone else.
One of the most common complaints of families who
have nannies, who live in, is that the family feels uncomfortable in their own
house. This is usually a two way problem, except that if your live in nanny has
had other live in jobs, she may actually be more comfortable than you are.
People who come from big families where privacy is normally at a premium are
more at ease with live in help than those who are used to a lot of privacy.
The best way to establish comfort is to set up
schedules. Make it clear up front if you expect the nanny to eat with you and
your family, or if you’d like her to eat with the children, so you and your
husband can eat separately, or if you’d like her to eat in her room or by
herself.
If your neighbors tell gossip
about your nanny to you, you should listen, check it out with your nanny, and
then either put a stop to the gossip with your neighbors or just avoid
anyone who gossips.
